Everyone who has ever used ezboard has seen the ads. Everyone who's ever viewed internet unmentionables has viewed them. Pop-up ads are everywhere, it's a great way for sites to make a buck, for companies to get word about their products to people, and a great way to annoy the hell out of someone who just wants to look at smut.

But how often do we really look at pop-ups? Something could pop-up advertising a product that could solve all your worldly problems for an affordable and nice price, but unless it has female anatomic parts chances are most people close these windows by reflex. But not Vince, Vince looks regardless of the percentage of skin shown. Vince studies, Vince talks like a dumbass.

So, you may be asking yourself, what is it Vince sees? Vince sees lies, horrible lies. If these ads really caused what they inferred every horny sixteen year old kid out there would have beautiful women crawling around his house and now he could finally obtain a camera to spy on the most interesting intimate moments, from tickle fights to naked trampoline fun, it's always a party with a miniature camera.

Or is it? The sad truth folks, is that ads are all frauds. The imagery they show you? Lies, drinking Red Bull will not allow you to shoot wings out your back and fly away anymore than Nikes will give you the power to kickbox Michael Jordan, maybe Michael Eisner but never Michael Jordan. You might be able to take Michael J. Fox too but I bet he bites.

But aside from that it's a simple fact, you cannot get hot women by simply purchasing a camera. You cannot sprout wings by simply drinking a miracle drink that lowers your sperm count more than it energizes, and more importantly kids need to remember that the Toys R' Us Giraffe is most likely tortured with a metal electro-shock tube before he says his lines, and the Taco Bell dog was most likely made into a Chalupa of poor quality long ago.

So what's a person supposed to do when the entire advertisement industry is lying to him? Lie down and cry like a helpless child? No! You get up, you go out and you buy whatever you please. Always wanted a candy cellphone? Go get one, it may not bring you true happiness, and it may lead to horrible car accidents if you attempt to call Aunt Gerta while driving, or you could even get a candy tumor, but the point is you're on your road to happiness. And that's the only road anyone should ever have to take.