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"if viewed by accident...induce vomitting"  

You are a Demographic You are a Demographic
By Vince401
You are a demographic. It's as simple as that. Some of you are wondering "What does that mean?" Well it's simple really, it means there's some whacked out company out there that has you in mind, they want to know what you like and what you think about things pertaining to products. You are an important person and nobody wants to see you get run over by a bus, so quit assuming everyone's waiting to laugh at your most likely un-funny death.

So you would think, as a target market you should have the power to change how the industries in general work. Wrong, what everyone always forgets is that marketers already know everything about you. A good example is teenagers, marketers have the Teenage psyche completely figured out. They know you like fast cars, buxom women, illegal drinking, sesame street, and people getting hit by buses. They even think when you are going to a movie your conversations work like this:

Teenage Boy1: What movie should we see?
Teenage Boy2: How about (Movie Title)?
Teenage Boy1: Yeah I heard there's breasts in that, and being uncontrollably horny all I want to see is breasts in a five second shot, when instead I could go home and download pornography that's 10 times better off illegal programs.
Teenage Boy2: ROCK ON!
*high five*

That or there's the more radical choices:

Teenage Boy1: Hey let's see this movie.
Teenage Boy2: Yeah I heard a kid has sex with a pie in that.
Teenage Boy1: Great, as a teenager I can relate to having perfectly legal sex with baked goods.
Teenage Boy2: ROCK ON!
Teenage Boy1: Afterwards let's stop at the bakery and get a cake.
Teenage Boy2: Great, I'm starving.
Teenage Boy1: Yes.....heh....starving.....

Sound like an average day at the movies for you? Well according to corporate bigwigs it is. Everyone in the world is a sick perv who violates pastries that have committed no sins aside from being incredibly delicious. And how would you like that? What if you were perfectly delicious? Would you want some loser teenager coming by and getting lucky with you? Yes/No, the answer isn't important. What is important is that you fight back.

So how do you fight a market that knows everything about you? Obviously you can't just run up to them and kick them in the nuts till they make movies you like. Instead you have to cleverly and craftily create a machine that will convince them to listen to your opinions instead of just assuming. I've provided a blueprint below.

Common Questions About Demographics:

Q: I don't like having sex with pastries, what should I do?
A: Write your local congressman AND TELL HIM! Or her.....if you live somewhere crappy.

Q: American Pie came out like 4 years ago, can't you think of something better to trash?
A: Well there's always American Wedding, or American Family Insurance.

Q: I hate you and want you to die.
A: Well that's not a question.....Not a very good one at least.

Q: Why are you against women in congress?
A: I am a sexist bastard.

So in short, make gigantic death machines, and kill people with them. In the meantime I'm off to hunt out a video with a few minutes of nudity.